How To Lose a Prospect Online – Social Media Training

how to lose a

This blog post is a contributed piece by Lindsay Tompkins from Media Market. Check out her social media training in my FREE membership program, Direct Selling Now.

Sometimes in the pursuit of finding quality leads, we actually put ourselves two steps back.

I advocate all the time, to connect with others online and build relationships. And many of you ask, well where do I find these connections? How do I find people who may be interested in what I offer?

Social media platforms, like Facebook and Instagram are amazing platforms for finding new, excited, tech-savvy, and like-minded people – especially because there are millions of people right at our finger tips!

But we act like kids in a candy store. We get TOO excited at everything in front of us and we run around trying to scoop up everything that we can.

Social media is NOT a quick fix to your business. It takes time to nurture relationships, build a community and get people to TRUST you. That is why it is never, under any circumstance, okay to blindly cold-message people with your business spam.

We've had it happen to us. And truthfully, many of us have probably done it. And I understand why. You're passionate and excited about your business, products and opportunity. Your instinct, especially when you are new, is to run around and tell everyone you know (and don't know) about it. But reign yourself in, and be strategic about, because every wrong step you take, gets you further away from ever landing any of those leads.

A great way to build a relationship with people is to engage with them. You can do this by commenting on their posts, liking their photos and joining conversations that they start. By doing this, they are more likely to head over to your page and do the same. But remember, even though this is strategic, be authentic and genuine. If you come from a place of “it's about me,” instead of, “it's about them,” people will pick up on it right away. And people today do not want to be sold to. But luckily for us, they still want to buy.

The reason I am writing this blog post is because something happened this weekend. And I mean it's not the first time it's happened to me and it certainly won't be the last. But I was hanging out with Belinda (we recorded my episode for her podcast Work From Your Happy Place, which launches March 7, and brainstormed for DSN Plus), and I told her this conversation between me and a direct sales Consultant and she was FLOORED! Like, completely blown away. And even more so blown away by the fact that I wasn't phased by it. And that is really the sad thing! That we have now come to expect this from direct sellers – the spammy hard sell.

So let me walk you through how the conversation went:

Consultant adds me to Facebook. I accept because I love making new friends and building my circle of entrepreneurs.

Consultant: Hi! Thanks for accepting my friend request. Over the next few weeks I'm putting together a small group of people that I'll be working super close with. I wanted to reach out to you because I have a few goals for the group – first is to get each person earning $599 a month and a $500 bonus. It'll be work but totally worth it. I know this is super random but I would totally love for you to do this with me.

Me thinking to myself: Who is this person? I've never spoken to her before. Did we just become friends? Do we have any mutual friends? Why would she love to do this with me? She doesn't even know me. She doesn't know what industry I'm interested in or if I would even be a good fit for her products. Well this is super spammy. Even though she's saying she wants to make me money, the nature of just messaging me about her business makes it all about her.

Me: No thank you. I already work in direct sales. I'm a social media direct sales trainer and I train others on how to better reach out to people. Not to be bratty (I swear I'm not! Just helpful), one of the things I train is not to just cold message people. It's really spammy and can put people off about our business before we actually get a chance to connect with them. I offer training if you would like, through Direct Selling Now. There is also a PLUS option if you prefer.

But you see, if I would have just added you randomly, and tried to sell you on my program, you might be a bit put off. My business mantra is definitely to build a business differently. I hate how people view this industry as a bunch of spammers. It's a legit business with smart, intelligent, hardworking entrepreneurs. Just some advice.

Consultant: Oh no thank you. I already get great training with my business and I'm at a pretty high rank.

Me: The group is for every level of leader. We have leaders with over 80,000 people in their downline. I just always suggest being open to new training, especially if it helps attract different types of people to your business.

* I then go over to her Facebook page to try to learn a bit more about her. When I realize, she has unfriended me*

Me: I see you unfriended me.

Consultant: Yeah so I don't message you again about joining.

Me: It's definitely your business! But I suggest not blindly messaging people in the first place. Create amazing relationships! AND you just wrote me off, completely. Being spammed didn't feel nice, and this actually feels a little worse. You could have apologized that I took it as spammy and then continued to nurture a relationship with me. Comment on a post or two of mine, like a photo. And then maybe I would have kept seeing your posts and been like, “Wow, maybe this is something I want to be a part of.” But because I said no, you're just done with me.

Consultant: Well it works for me. And since you're in the business, I'm sure you've heard of ______. So you would have already wanted the product, and I'm positive you would have tried it by now.

Me: I have definitely heard of it, but actually haven't tried it. I actually wanted to purchase ______ for a while now. But I won't be doing that through you now 🙁

Consultant: Alright then.

This isn't the first time I've had a conversation like this, and like I mentioned it won't be the last. I'm sure you've had plenty of them too. I mean, once I received the EXACT SAME MESSAGE from three different people in the matter of 5 minutes. And that's certainly a good way to lose a prospect.

So what are the lessons here?

  • Don't be spammy and cold message people.
  • Build authentic relationships.
  • Be in social media for the long-haul, not short term gain.
  • Treat others with respect.
  • If someone says no, don't write them off. Chances are it doesn't mean no forever, it probably means no for right now. And sometimes no can also mean no to the service we offered. They may not be interested in the business, but might be interested in the product or for hosting.

So be as excited as the kid in the candy store, but handle yourself like the more mature, patient, adult in the candy store counting calories.

If you want more social media training from Lindsay, don't forget to join our FREE community Direct Selling Now! She shares with us every single month along side me and my digital training superstar, Lydia Martin.