When I ask people, “Are you successful with your business?” I often get a blank stare in return.
There’s a pause where the person just doesn't know how to answer.
There's a hesitation.After that tell-tale hesitation, they say things like, “I guess, I don’t know” “I’m not really sure,” “I’m not breaking the bank,” “I’m working hard,” “I’m holding my own” or “I’m not doing as well as so-and-so is doing.”
That hesitation tells me that that person really hasn’t identified what success looks like for them.
When I ask that question, most people’s brains instantly go to high-level expectations - am I a top-selling sales rep for my company, am I one of the top earners at my firm, do I hold a high position or have an important title within my company.If the answer is “no,” they’re not sure how to answer.
Here’s what you need to know...success doesn’t necessarily mean being #1.
Success is an achievement of the goals you have set for yourself.
For some, that might be attaining a high position in their company or reaching a certain income level. For others, success is meeting their family’s needs and having enough for the extra things in life. While, for yet another person, success may be running the entire business, and having teams of people who count on your leadership. Success to someone else might mean they are happy, content, and enjoy what they do every day.
Not everyone wants the same thing.
The only “success” that you need to be focused on is your own.You have to decide what YOUR picture of success looks like. You cannot create a success story for yourself if you don’t first have a picture of what that success looks like in your mind.People that do this, take the time and effort to create a vision of what they want it to look like. They take the time and effort to understand what their goals are. They take the time and effort to break those goals down into daily action steps, so they get up every morning and know exactly what they are doing. They hit the ground running; they have a path, they have a map, and they know where the next step is going to take them.
When we don't define what success looks like for ourselves, it's very easy to get trapped into comparing yourself to others. Comparison quickly leads to not feeling good about yourself, because you aren't as “successful” as someone else that you might see.
When I first started out as a speaker, I had set a goal of eight speaking engagements per month. To me, that was my picture of success. We started out booking three to four per month, quickly got to five or six, and then we were hitting eight to ten on a consistent basis.
At the same time, another speaker who was a competitor of mine, would post her speaking calendar, showing that she would have 18-23 speaking gigs per month!
I couldn’t understand how she had so much more than me. I became frustrated; almost obsessed.
Then, I was reminded that my original goal was eight. We were hitting and exceeding my personal goal every month. I did not want to be away from my family 18-23 days of the month.
Once I was able to quit comparing myself to her, and stay focused on MY success picture, I not only grew a very successful business, but I was also happy, and enjoying what I was doing!
If you haven't identified what your own success looks like, it can make you feel down, and doubt yourself when, in fact, you are doing a great job.You must create a success story for yourself, and identify what that looks like.
Here are some questions to ask yourself and answer that will give you some clarity:
- What do you like to do?
- What do you not want to do?
- What motivates me (Money? A flexible schedule? Being a leader? Being a solid part of a team? Freedom? A work-life balance that you are in control of?)
- What would I be able to do if I ‘leveled-up’ my skills or my productivity?
- What would my day need to look like in order to get where I want to go?
- How would my life be different if I took different actions consistently?
- Why do you want to change something about your life?
- What are you already grateful for in your life?
- Where do you see yourself at this time next year?
- How can you get there?
- What do you need to do to move closer to that?
The more clear you are about YOU, the more excited you get about accomplishing your goals. Why? Because they’re YOUR goals; they’re not someone else’s!
When there’s a fire in your belly because you are loving what you are working towards, it’s easier to set goals, get up every morning, jump right in and get the results that you intentionally created for yourself with joy.
When you work your plan, you’ll never hesitate again.
XOXO!
Belinda