A long time ago, I put a half-full glass of water on the corner of my desk.
It has not left that corner for 20 years.
You are, no doubt, familiar with the idea of how optimists see the glass as half full, while pessimists see it as half empty.
But it’s so much more than that.
That glass of water serves me in several ways, depending on my state of mind.
That water reminds me that my glass is always half full. Even on rough days, I have a lot for which to be grateful.
If I’m having a rough day, and I’m choosing to see the glass as half-empty, it makes me reassess or analyze why I am feeling this way.
That glass gives me control - it refocuses me - I get to change my mind. I get to choose the course of my day.
I am the only one who can choose how to see it. That’s a powerful tool.
Without that glass to remind me that I have an option, it’s easy to fall into habit.
Pessimism and optimism are BOTH habits, and of course, habits are simply choices made consistently over time.
Your pessimism or optimism may be a habit, but when you look at the glass, you can remind yourself that you can choose what habits serve you and which ones don’t.
How you choose to see the water in the glass determines more than your attitude. It determines your likability, whether you feel in control or out of control, your level of stress, whether you are being productive or just spinning your wheels, or if anxiety is holding you back from moving forward with something you want to do; it affects every single aspect of your life!
That being said, do you consider yourself an optimist or a pessimist?
The funny thing is that most of you probably answered that question by saying that you are an optimist OR that you are a “realist” (and that wasn’t my question).
Pessimists often consider themselves “realists,” and believe that optimists have their heads in the clouds.
The truth is the extremes of both pessimism or optimism are not logical. If you shut everything down OR believe everything is possible, you’re being delusional.
A key to success is being grounded in possibility. After all, possibility is what drives anything forward. Without it, everything would stay exactly the same.
There are a lot of articles that talk about the power of optimism, but I want to talk to you about the destructive nature of pessimism.
The pessimist attitude dictates your entire life...and it makes it so you can’t win long term.
The reality is, in every interaction you have, you are a human talking to another human. How you make that other person feel is going to determine everything else about you.
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” (Maya Angelou)
From the pessimist’s view, they are often convinced that the world is out to get them. This is in stark contrast to the optimist, who knows that they are in control of finding solutions and opportunities...because they are everywhere.
Pessimists act as if they know everything; optimists know they don’t, that’s exactly why they can see the opportunities, and act on them.
The pessimist says, “It’s not going to work” (before they even try), while the optimist says, “It might work; let’s give it a try.”
This makes spending time with pessimists draining. They wear you out, and it eats your energy. It’s exhausting.
I have seen many smart and talented individuals lose opportunities, because bosses and leaders don’t want that negative energy on the team.
People don’t want to do business with that kind of energy, and that’s bad for your business!
“The man who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the man doing it.” (Confucius)
Pessimists are not curious that’s why it’s harder for them to see all of the possibilities; optimists are curious from the get go.
Pessimists get stuck; optimists keep moving.
Pessimists are complainers; optimists are creators.
Pessimists are negative; optimists are positive.
Pessimists are closed; optimists are open.
Pessimists don’t trust many people; optimists give people the benefit of the doubt.
Pessimists don’t care for change; optimists are comfortable with change.
Pessimists often believe in “one way to do it;” optimists understand that one size does not fit all.
This article is not about saying that pessimists are “wrong,” and that there is no benefit to looking at the “negative” side of things.
My purpose with this article is to shine the light on what a pessimistic view of the world creates that does not serve people well.
When you choose to adopt the pessimistic view of your life, it will make you feel like a victim. It will feel like everything is conspiring against you. It will feel as if everything is always going wrong instead of things going right. A pessimistic person has a harder time sustaining happiness.
Optimists don’t typically feel those things.
When that weight of pessimism is off your shoulders, there is a freedom that allows you to not only move forward at a faster pace, but to feel more confident and happy while doing it.
When I am having a day when I feel as if the glass is half empty, it reminds me that it doesn’t matter, because the glass is refillable. I am in control of choosing my outlook for that day. I am in control of whether I can or I can’t. I am in control of whether I pull people in or push them away.
That glass reminds me that I am in control.
XOXO!
Belinda