Oprah Winfrey was fired from one of her first TV jobs because a producer said that she was “unfit for television.” Henry Ford’s first company went bankrupt. J.K. Rowling struggled to find a publisher who’d be willing to take a chance on her Harry Potter book. Michael Jordan didn’t make his high school basketball varsity team.
After those major setbacks, how did those individuals eventually become leaders in their respective industries?
The answer is they had a dream and they didn’t give up on it.
There are two types of dreams. A dream can be the thing that is on your mind 24/7, guiding you to make choices and decisions that all support the consistent actions you take every day until you attain it, or a dream can be something that you get really excited about and tell everyone it’s what you’re going to do, only to quit a few days later because you didn’t want to do all the work involved in actually attaining it.
Interestingly, there’s no middle ground when it comes to dreams.
The reason there can be such a vast difference between these two extremes is because dreams are all in your head. Unlike goals, which are based on creating specific actions to accomplish a result, dreams can be played out in your head over and over without having to take any action at all.
Without action, dreams are just a story you tell yourself; no more than just an escape from your real life. It’s the equivalent of ‘binge watching’ in your own head.
But putting dreams and actions together is the formula for accomplishing anything you set your mind to.
The powerful thing about dreams is that there are no limits to them. You can dream literally anything you want, no matter how big or audacious it is. That’s the power of your mind. You can dream things first, and then begin constructing them in real life. It's easier to make things happen when you have already “seen” the outcome. If you start with the real life part first, most people would give up instantly because things would seem overwhelming or impossible right from the beginning.
But when you are able to “see” the end results before you jump in to build it, it can inspire and motivate you to take whatever action is necessary.
The bigger you dream, the more possibility you see.
People like Winfrey, Ford, Rowling and Jordan dreamed big and put consistent action into their dreams. That’s why they made them happen.
But more people give up on their dreams then fulfil them. Why is that?
Everyone has dreams, whether they are big or small. But it is the step between dreaming and doing that prevents most people from reaching their dreams. They might need more knowledge or ability, they might need to create different daily habits, or they might need to get past the self-limiting beliefs that prevent them from taking the action they need to take.
There are different reasons why we “give up” on our dreams, some intentional and some not. Some reasons are valid, while others are just lazy.
Sometimes dreams end on their own. A person may have begun working towards their dream and realized along the way that it was no longer their dream. It used to be, but it’s not anymore. We outgrow interests we once had and make intentional choices to stop working towards them. Maybe we replaced it with another dream that we’re now working towards. Letting go of a dream with intention allows you to grow into new possibilities.
On the flip side, it’s not uncommon for a person to give up once they realize how much work is actually involved in making their dream happen. When we talk about our dream but don’t want to do the work involved, we become lazy, and lazy kills dreams better than anything else can.
Probably the most common reason people give up on a dream is because they only wanted the end result. The shiny object at the end always looks awesome! But there’s a lot that needs to be done between where you are now and where that shiny object is. They want immediate rewards and when they don’t get them, they decide it’s ‘too hard’ or ‘takes too long’ or ‘is not worth it.’
Other reasons people fail to pursue their dreams include:
- Fear (They want security and get bogged down with asking “What if?”)
- Someone else said they couldn’t do it
- They don’t understand that failure is part of success
- They get bored
- They get stuck
- They stop believing in themselves
- They value others’ opinions over their own
- They don’t realize that other people telling you ‘you can’t do that’ has nothing to do with you or your abilities
- They are surrounded by “joy-robbers” and “dream-crushers”
- They are impatient
- They don’t hold themselves accountable (They don’t have enough discipline.)
If you have a dream and are committed to making it happen, here are five things to begin doing right now:
- Don’t listen to negative people or people who tell you you “can’t” do it (They are talking about themselves, not you.)
- Keep visualizing and focusing forward (What will it become? Keep that picture in your head and keep moving towards it!)
- Set tangible goals, break those goals down into little pieces, and take action every day (Dreams take time to become reality; be in it for the long haul.)
- Hang out with people who are supportive and encouraging (Who you choose to surround yourself with often determines whether you succeed or not.)
- Be patient with yourself (Good things take time.)
When you incorporate these things into your daily life, it becomes easier to manage the “bad” days (when you feel like quitting) and harder to give up.
Dreams are the preview of the value you bring to the world. But to bring them to life, dreams need action.
If you have a real dream, and you are committed to making that dream happen, don’t let anything or anyone talk you out of it. Practice self-discipline, patience, and persistence everyday without fail and then get out there and change the world.
In part 2, we discover how you’re never too old to dream and at what point in our lives do we stop dreaming.